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Cockney Alphabet

The idea for my Cockney Alphabet came from ”Schott’s Original Miscellany” upon which it is loosely based.
I can thoroughly recommend the book as an excellent Christmas stocking filler.

ISBN 0-7475-6320-9 Ben Schott

I had wondered if there would be a problem with people understanding the humour of the alphabet if they have no experience of the Cockney tongue.

Cockney is a careless way of speaking.
The Hs are dropped e.g. hand = ‘and. Hay = ‘a. Horse = ‘orse.
Th is pronounced f e.g. things = fings.
Ing on the end of a word, the g is dropped. e.g. going = goin.
Going out = goin ‘ut

I don’t think I am very good at explaining this.
As a chap who stammers I pronounce my words badly anyway.

Some of the letters are rather obscure others are easy.

An explanation will follow Z.

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Please click on the thumbnails to see the photo and information.
Cockney Alphabet
Cockney Alphabet
A for 'orses
A for 'orses
B for mutton
B for mutton
C for miles
C for miles
D for mation of character
D for mation of character
E for nin' standard
E for nin' standard
F for vessence
F for vessence
G for police
G for police
H for consent
H for consent
I for detail
I for detail
J for oranges
J for oranges
K for teria
K for teria
L for fairy
L for fairy
M for sis
M for sis
N for lope
N for lope
O for the wings of a dove
O for the wings of a dove
P for ming
P for ming
Q for snooker
Q for snooker
R for nicker
R for nicker
S for you
S for you
T for dentures
T for dentures
U for rear
U for rear
V for la France
V for la France
W for quits
W for quits
X for breakfast
X for breakfast
Y for mistress
Y for mistress
Z for breezes
Z for breezes
Explanation
Explanation