I’m feeling sorry for myself tonight, after the bitterest pill imaginable served up to us this afternoon, as Spurs got dumped down to 5th place in the Premiership. We’ve been in 4th since 2nd December and today, the last day of the season, we got shunted down by a combination of West Ham and ARSEnal doing better than we did. I must say, it’s made worse by the suggestion of foul play as our team got poisoned before the game but anyway, as things stand we’re fifth tonight. I suppose I must take heart from the beginning of the season when if I’d been asked, I’d have said I’d be overjoyed with a fifth place at the end of the day.

DM has just walked into our den as I sit here and said ‘who’d have thought that fifth would feel so bad?’ I agree – it feels like an ‘also ran’.

Weirdly, this isn’t the only ‘low light’ of my day as I’ve also been ‘dumped’ today too by a (now ex) friend. I’m feeling more than a bit sore over it and clearly so is she. I feel used and she feels cheated. I suppose if both parties have to ‘suffer’ to make the situation even then we’re quits overall but it still leaves a really nasty taste in the mouth. This has been brewing for several months now and without going into any detail, I have known throughout that time I suppose that it would sooner-or-later end our friendship because right from the start, I couldn’t see a way in which a bad situation could have an amicable outcome. Either I remained feeling used or she remained feeling cheated and in the event we’re both experiencing those feelings.

I should have done some things differently and so, I think, should she. I have to accept the lion’s share of the responsibility for the problems because I was wrong-footed in the first instance and didn’t have the courage to grasp the nettle to put it right before it got totally out of hand. I suppose that makes me a coward too.

For me, the lesson I’ve learned is to set boundaries and make sure they are clear right from the start of a new situation. If I’d done that, I wouldn’t have ended up feeling used and ultimately neither would she have ended up feeling cheated. Ah well, you live and learn as they say. It’s cost me dearly, both in terms of a friendship and financially too to find that one out but it won’t again.

This weekend was supposed to be really good and today it has all gone very sour indeed.

Last year too, things were gloomy in my world.