To him who has once tasted the reckless independence,

the haughty self-reliance, the sense of irresponsible

freedom, which the forest life engenders, civilization

thenceforth seems flat and stale. Its pleasures are

insipid, its pursuits wearisome, its

conventionalities, duties, and mutual dependences

alike tedious and disgusting. The wilderness --

rough, harsh, inexorable -- has charms more potent in

their seductive influence than all the lures of luxury

and sloth. And often he on whom it has cast its Magic

finds no heart to dissolve the spell, and remains a

wanderer and an Ishmaelite to the hour of his death.

-- Francis Parkman

This is not the best quality shot of the day (my shutter speed was too slow to fully stop the movement); however, it is my favorite. I felt privileged as I was able to watch this elegant Blue Heron catch and eat supper just a few feet below me.

The Blue Herons live year-round in the Puget Sound area, and they feed on small fish in the spring and summer months and on small rodents when necessary in the winter. The adult birds are majestic in appearance and they can be four feet tall with a six foot wing span. Because they have hollow bones, they are lightweight (around five pounds for an adult) and graceful in flight. They nest in groups (called heronries) in tall trees near bodies of water. I was really excited this year, to see a new nesting site developing along my route to and from work. In the winter, it was always amazing to me to look up into the high branches of the bare trees and see the enormous outlines of dozens of blue herons. The trees are beginning to leaf out for the summer and as a result the site is mostly hidden, but if one looks carefully, one can still detect the outline of these amazing animals in the distance.

Today is my last day in San Diego. In some ways, two weeks has been a long time to be away from home. I miss my dog and my friends. Yet, in other ways, two weeks has gone by so very fast. When I am away from home, away from the city, away from my responsible adult life, I am free. When I am participating in my city life (ok, yes, I am being melodramatic... but still...), I feel as though I am in bondage. I am merely doing time until I can shed the shackles of responsiblity and once more run barefoot through a field, chase butterflies on a whim, eat with my fingers, and sleep in the dirt.

I do my very best to incorporate little acts of freedom into my daily life in the city, but it just does not ring the same. My soul and my spirit know that it is not real freedom. I'm just spinning my wheels on the "clover leaf" of life. Oh how I wish that I could figure out how to be me, be responsible and still be free.

Below is an excerpt from my 2005 Trailjournal about the same subject:

So, what is freedom anyway? It seems that in today's society that freedom is a very subjective term. I can't speak for the millions of "lost souls" wandering about their collective lives, but for me, the term has taken on a whole new meaning. I would even push a bit further by saying that most, if not all, people living in a modern "civilized" culture, have absolutely NO concept of true freedom. We are continually bombarded with images and "suggestions" regarding who we should be, how we should look, how we should behave, what we should own, and etc... Is it any wonder that Americans have become this bland homogenized mixture of folks who look alike, talk alike, and want the same useless crap filling up their overflowing city dwellings?

Having been gifted with the opportunity to "step away" from civilized society as we know it, I experienced a brand of freedom that is seldom seen by American adults. Have you ever really closely watched pre-school aged children going about their lives? They appear to be uniquely enthralled with their surroundings, and in my opinion, they are one of the few "demographic" segments of our society that are truly free to be just exactly WHO THEY REALLY ARE. Their minds appear to be, as yet, untouched by the 'shoulds' and 'should nots' of society. They are inventive, enthusiastic, playful and creative. Self-doubt is not yet a part of their psyche. With this mind set, anything and everything is possible. This is my new definition of freedom.

The greatest gift that came to me from spending time alone in the wilderness was the amazing uncensored freedom to be who and what I am, at any given moment, without society's undue influence on my behavior.

The transition back into city living has not been without its difficulties. I miss the freedom. I miss the quiet. I miss the sights and smells and the wind and the ravens. I miss being around people who smile back at me when I smile at them. I miss the simplicity of it all.

The most brilliant revelation I have received as a result of living in the woods for five and a half months is that I don't really need much "stuff" to be happy. In fact, material possessions are a burden and I have been downsizing considerably since I returned to the city.... I just want a calm existence... no clutter.... no chaos... no confusion.

I now have a brilliantly keen understanding of why people come back to the trail year after year. I know that there are treasures to be found on a long distance trail that just don't exist in any other plane.

So, for me, the question is not will I return to the trail. It is rather, when will I return to the trail?!!!

It is 12:30am, and I am "stealth camped" on a private road about six miles before the entrance to kings Canyon National Park. Today was another really long day wih its share of joy and frustrations.

I got up and packed out of my campsite bright and early this morning. I headed up the road toward Sonora Pass, and made the turn off. Yep, the road closed signs were still up. I decided to drive and see for myself. Sure enough, the road is closed. The Caltrans workers said it should be opened tomorrow....grrrrr. I of course, gave them an earful about how mad I was, and they shouldn't have told all the public agencies and radio stations that the road was going to be opened if it wasn't! Grrrrr.

The worker told me where to go, literally, I should drive to hiway 89 and take hiway 4 and Ebbits Pass across. So, off I go up to the next pass, as instructed, I take hiway 89, I turn on hiway 4 and, yep.... there they are...more road closed signs. Grrrrr. At this point I am really hacked... well, just screw it... I am going to drive thru anyway. I drive up the road, fuming the whole way, to find a wonderful Caltrans crew in action. I gave the flagger a piece of my mind. Of course, telling him I knew it wasn't his fault, but I was still hacked. He said I needed to go back to 89 and take the junction to 88 which would take me over Carsons Pass. I told him that if hwy 88 was closed when I got there, that I was going to come back and choke him. He knew I was just kidding, but he was definitely sympathetic to my frustration, although there wasn't a thing he could do about it.

So now I am so close to Lake Tahoe it is just stupid. I definitely hadn't planned to come this far north, but at this point, I've gone to so much effort and I can be so incredibly stubborn, it is 'Yosemite or bust'. Hiway 88 and Carson Pass were the winning combination. The road was quite scenic, and as I had been here before in 2005, I was flooded with memories, but again, didn't stop... Yosemite or bust!

It wasn't really clear where I needed to go once I reached the town of Sonora... and the town was absolutely jammed with traffic and people getting ready for some type of festival... I know that I did see signs for the festival of frogs.. i.e., the famous jumping frogs of Calaveras County... that is in a book that I read as a child by Mark Twain I believe. Now, that would be a fun festival to attend!! Anyway, little old ladies were rushing across streets with reckless abandon delivering their rice casserole and hot apple crumble to the local meeting hall for the potluck supper. I finally figured out how to get out of town, and once again, I was motoring toward Yosemite.

I reached the hiway 120 junction (the hiway to Yosemite), and there was a young guy walking on the hiway. He was looking all decked out with brand new REI backpacking gear. I pulled over and asked him if he needed a lift (my good hitch-hiking karma rule is to always offer a ride to anyone walking on the road with a backpack -- with personal discretion of course). He was heading to Yosemite and couldn't believe how quickly he scored a ride and that I was actually going all the way to Yosemite.

He seemed like a nice kid. He was 26 years old, and a bad boy wannabe. He had a long beard which he had woven into a single braid of sorts dropping 6 inches or so below his chin. He claims to make his living shooting video and making and selling DVD's. He gave me his web address, so I will have to check it out when I get home. He was awed when I pulled out my park pass and he didn't have to chip in for the entry fees. I think I just earned some good hitchhiking karma points!

I didn't hit the valley floor until after 2pm. I had originally set myself up to be at Yosemite in the morning and then cruise to Sequoia in the afternoon. Well, as they say, life is what happens when you're busy making other plans. I just grabbed my camera gear and a crutch and headed out. I completely let my hearts gravitational pull guide me where it wanted. I found myself walking toward half dome. Not on a trail, just walking toward it.... being pulled closer and closer. I found myself on a trail to mirror lakes and I kept going and going. I finally arrived at the lake and it was absolutely right smack below half dome. I should mention, that when I was on my cross country pull towards halfdome, I flushed a coyote out of the meadow. I took a few shots, but he was really too far away to get anything good.

Once I'd satisfied myself with photos from every possible angle, I took the shuttle out to Yosemite Falls and made the walk up to the base. It is so different and incredibly powerful with the spring runoff cascading down the face of a sheer cliff. The wind generated by the force of the falling water was really quite impressive. I took several shots, and found a pretty pleasing composition; although the light was gone. The falls were in shade. It made me really want to spend the night and try to get the falls in the morning, but Yosemite Valley is so popular that you have to make reservations months in advance. I continued my exploration, and was surprised to feel a huge lump in my throat and tears squeezing out of my eyes. oh, how I did not want to leave! I could easily spend an entire vacation exploring the sites and trails around Yosemite. I finally made my way back to my little rental car at aound 8pm, just as the light was beginning to fade away for the day.

I drove and I drove. I did stop at one hotel about halfway here at 10pm or so, and they only had smoking rooms available. Ugggh. I decided to keep driving. I just kept driving... not really knowing what else to do. I didn't see any campsites and there aren't many street lights out here, which doesn't help.

I kept getting closer and closer to the Sequoia National Park entrance, and knew that I wouldn't be allowed to stealth camp inside Thankfully, just before the park entrance, there was a spur road. I drove up it aways, pulled off the road, flipped down the seats and prepared for a restless

and uncomfortable night.

At least I didn't have to struggle about whether to spend extra time in the high sierras or continue on up Highway 395. If I can get my butt up and out of this sleeping bag, I should be in Lone Pine this morning. Lone Pine is the only trail town along 395 that I stayed in during my thruhike in 2005. I know where the public showers are, the laundry, the library, the chamber visitors center, etc.

I am drinking coffee now, still snug in my sleeping bag... ahhhhh! I slept like the dead last night, which is surprising to me given my level of activity yesterday (read that to mean none)... but I guess the heat can really zap you, and even up here at a higher altitude, it was definitely a scorcher.

Later...

Well today was spectacular! Oh the places I've been and the things that I have seen. It is really hard to believe that it was just this morning that I was camped on the Kern River! The town of Kernville really is charming. Very well kept and tidy. As I drove thru at 7am, nothing was open to explore, but the town definitely warrants further research. As I drove around the far side of Lake Isabella, the morning light was magical. I really really really should have pulled off to take some pictures, but I had the morning commute on my butt (all 5 cars) and there were no pull outs on my side of the road. I regret not doing that now... heck, I regretted not doing it at the time.

The drive to Lone Pine was very nice. Highway 395 takes the low path through the valley floor, but rising up on either side are quite impressive mountain ranges. As the Sierras got closer and closer, the level of my excitement and emotion built as well. I get teary now just thinking of the love I have for these hills. As soon as I arrived in Lone Pine, I headed out on movie film road to try and find and photograph the famous Lone Pine arch. The time of day and lighting were not ideal, but I think I got some pretty good shots anyhow.

Next I drove up to Whitney Portal which is the launch site for Mt. Whitney attempts from the Lone Pine side. Mt. Whitney at 14,495 feet above sea level, is the tallest peak in the lower 48 states. I had always wondered what the Portal was like, as I summitted Whitney from the other side. I will say that Whitney looks pretty damned impressive from the east side... so rugged... the jagged spires rising into the sky appearing to be totally impenetrable. Needless to say, I took many photos on the way up the winding mountain road. Whitney Portal itself is not how I imagined it at all. I pictured a wind scrubbed boulder field with a bare parking lot and a fortress of a store, but Whitney Portal is actually tucked in a grove of thick pine trees, with a stream and a little fish pond just in front of the store. In fact, the trees are so thick that you have absolutely no views of the summit whatsoever. It's really funny how you can have an idea in your mind of what something will be like, and once you see it you find that you are totally wrong. The place was completely overrun by stellar jays... really gorgeous birds with brilliant blue plumage... I came away with some pretty fun photos.

The next town on my itinerary was Independence, population 500+. It was a cute little town and although it is considerably smaller than Lone Pine, it seems that the properties are better kept. Some of the properties in Lone Pine are just total junk heaps. The homes and yards in Independence were mostly nice and well cared for. I took another long and winding mountain drive up to Onion Valley and the trailhead for Kearsarge Pass, which intersects with the JMT and PCT up top. I was the only person there, and after I took a little stoll up the trail aways, I struggled with wanting to just drop everything, grab my backpack, and head all the way up. It is really frustrating to me that the people in my life don't understand this "call of the wild" that I feel. I know my parents and even my boyfriend to some degree just think I am irresponsible. I should just settle down, work everyday, buy a bunch of crap that I don't want or need, and live happily ever after. Ugggggh! The only reason I can even justify hanging out in town and being a slave to the man, is so that I can save more money to spend more time on the trail. Maybe this will change for me someday... I had no idea when I got off the trail in 05 that the pull to go back would be so strong.

Back down into the lowlands once again, as I traveled through the booming metropolis of Big Pine which is really just a wide spot in the road (ok... I exaggerate a little), I spied a sign pointing east which said, "Ancient Bristlecone Forest 24 miles" As if on auto pilot, the car swerved right, and we were off (me and the car,that is) I had seen the bristlecone forest on the map and thought it was a hundred miles or so off of 395... now 24 miles... that is doable!

The hiway to get there was one of the narrowest, windiest, steepest mountain roads yet, climbing from just over 3,000 feet to up above 10,000 feet. I didn't make it to the visitors center, but rather, parked in a pullout just inside the boundary of the forest. Camera in hand, I dutifully trudged up the hillside to try to capture photographically what nature has spent hundreds if not thousands of years creating.

I swear it was the first big tree I saw... I walked up to its base to get a wide angle shot looking up into its colorful and contorted branches, when I notice just a few feet away, a fat marmot poking his head out of a hole beneath the trees roots. I got some great shots of both the tree and the marmot... one where he looks like he is going to attack, with his mouth wide open and showing fangs. (In reality, I think he was just yawning, but it is an awesome shot!) There was an amazing vantage point that gave amazing views into the high sierras... a bit far away to get a good photo though.

Back down the hill I go.... headed toward Bishop, to get some fuel (both for me and the car) and then on to the Green Church hotsprings to camp for the night. I've been hearing about the Green Church hotsprings ever since my PCT hike. It is supposed to be one of the best around, and it is a local hangout and not advertised.... just turn at the Green Church. Allegedly, you could get a campsite with your own private hottub for $10 a night.

In Bishop, I grabbed a quick bite, and drove thru town...keeping an eye out for the green church. I gassed up the car, and asked the attendant if he knew where it was, and he said, oh yeah, that is near Lake Crowley, (which is just a bit north of town) but, they had to close down in June of last year, apparently there had been some type of geothermal event and a couple of skiers were killed.

Grooooooaaaaan!!!

Ok.... plan B, so Mr. Gas station attendant, is there a road that will take me up into the sierras to camp for the night? He was very helpful, and I am now camped on the bank of Bishop Creek at 8500 feet... I will say that it was unbearably hot down below, and here, I am wearing my down jacket and a hat.

There were two campsites higher on the map, and after a perilous mountain drive, I discovered them to be closed. So damned frustrating!!!!!

Well, tomorrow, I will head into Mammoth Lakes.... I'm having fun.

I am camped out in Joshua Tree National Park at the hidden valley campground. Originally, I had not intended to camp here. I thought I would just do a quick drive thru and be on my way. When I got here and saw how magical this place really is, I grabbed the first camping spot I saw. The campsites are nestled right up against amazing gigantic granite boulders. The field surrounding the camp is filled with more Joshua Trees with even more amazing boulder formations in the distance.

When I got back to camp this evening, after a full afternoon of exploring, I could hear the distinctive beat of a drum echoing from across the camp. It was not invasive and lent a very nice ambience to the evening.

Today, I went for a couple of "easy" nature loop hikes (about a mile each). These hikes were really a great way to get up close and personal with the vegetation. The first hike, I wound up getting off onto a climbers path and into some pretty scrambly terrain. From my high vantage point, I could clearly see my easy nature loop in the valley below. I retraced my steps and only after being attacked and stung by several bees, did I make it down to the floor to complete the "easy" loop.

There is alot you can see in this park right from the road, so I did the "fat american tourist" thing and drove along, stopping at the requisite pullouts along the way.

This is a big park, and backcountry travel and camping is allowed, although there is no water available. You must carry what you will need for your entire backpacking trip. The park wants you to leave the natural water sources for the wild animal population.

There are just a few attractions that I want to catch in the morning,

and then I am off to Kernville and the giant Sequoias.