Visitors to PBase's World Headquarters encounter this cheery welcome upon approaching
the entrance to the Visitors' Center/Fleet Vehicle Disposal Facility. Things aren't
like they used to be in the good old days before terrorism, hackers, and computer
viruses. PBase must be ever-vigilant in the battle against Those Who Would Subvert
Your Surfing and has taken measures---some unpleasant or inconvenient---to ensure
that you never have to get up from your chair because of a server crash, virus attack,
or an infiltration by used electrons (they slow the display of images).

Sadly, PBase is forced to employ barbaric practices such as that depicted by the sign.
What the sign does not mention is that a person found to be carrying pencils, pens,
nail files, yo-yos, or four-foot-long fluorescent light bulbs will have the offending
item(s) confiscated and will be promptly escorted to the Education Room, where he or
she (or it) will be forced to watch a movie that depicts the horror of losing one's
internet connection in the middle of a severe session of surfing. WARNING: the movie
is quite graphic and is not suitable for impressionable minds. The recidivism rate
of those who have been educated in this manner is zero percent and holding steady.

If you’ll form a line over here we’ll begin the tour. Please watch your step.
.