OK – I know that this will be ‘beyond the pale’ for some…..indeed if these were mine (which they’re not), I’d never have photographed them for pbase. In fact, this shot is perfect demonstration of a number of things. I like to think I ‘push the boundaries’ in my PAD. On this occasion, I am proud to report that I have shoved a couple quite hard. Firstly the subject matter – I’ll bet that, for once, this subject has NOT appeared as anyone else’s PAD. Secondly, to photograph such a subject with a lensbaby – I doubt that the lensbaby has EVER been used to photograph this subject before. So, there are two ways that I’m striking out today. My photo of a toilet roll was one of my first big 'successes' in my first year of PAD and this is the most vulgar shot since I reckon!

Right, now onto my story!

If you’re a regular, you’ll know of the horrors lurking in the bathroom of this house….and no, I don’t mean either me or DM naked in the bath, I mean all the other stuff. (Bare bottoms allowed – that, m’lud is the case for the prosecution!!!!!!!!)

Last night, after taking my shot, I noticed a pile of unidentified objects piled up on the floor of said ‘room of horrors’. It turned out that they were things that the builders had retrieved from the bottom of the airing cupboard when it was dismantled. There were some pretty gruesome objects, including some of ‘Brentford Nylons’ (a nasty shop selling brushed nylon flowery sheets in the 1970s) finest bedding. Strangely there was a pearly plastic seahorse and a bathmat that had clearly seen better days.

Under the pile though, was this ‘piece de resistance’ – a packet of ‘granny sannies’ – that had been carefully placed under the pile of stuff so as not to cause embarrassment to either builder or ‘lady of the house’. The trouble is THEY’RE NOT MINE.

I know, I know, the lady doth protest too much but in this case, it’s true. They’re really not mine. In fact, I dread to think how long they’ve been there because Mad Maureen was well-past the menopause when she moved here so they are the belongings of some long ago inhabitant, who is probably past the menopause herself now and no longer needs them, even if I was planning to forward them, which I’m not!

Don’t you just hate it when it’s this way around. Most of the time, I find myself wishing the floor would open up and swallow me for things I’ve done or dropped (like the occasion when my petticoat fell down when I was running for a bus in Kensington High Street so I stepped out of it and carried on running). It’s pretty rare for it to be the other way around.

So, I’m faced with a dilemma – do I make it known THEY’RE NOT MINE and embarrass me and the builders again or do I let them think I’d ever wear such things???? I dunno yet.

When I was talking to someone (don’t jump to conclusions about who, I discuss my PADs with quite a few folks) earlier today about whether or not I’d got the guts to take this shot for my PAD (boom boom, a PAD of a pad), I was told of another of these – a condom packet in the parents’ bed…..that REALLY got there in a bundle of dirty washing, not through abuse of said facility by offspring!!!! I guess, on balance, I’d rather have this one than that one.

As for whether this is tasteless and vulgar, let's face it, there has been a lot worse in the meta gallery.....and no, I don't mean all you folks who are trying to do the PAD challenge, before anyone jumps down my throat!

Last year my nose was in a special place - for which I thank Jeanne deeply!!!