I know, I know – another metaphorically beige image. Another decidedly beige day.

A day in the life of Linda: Before 9am take phone call from irate neighbour complaining about our lodger’s boyfriend’s inconsiderateness. Sympathise with neighbour. Sit in a darkened room, alone, writing essay about “magic traits”. (Don’t ask – they are nowhere near as exciting as you might imagine…or at least they are nowhere near as exciting as I’d imagined but maybe my imagination has been working mega overtime.) Go to Uni to sit in another darkened room where I wasn’t alone but might as well have been. Try to learn something. Rush back to car to go to Sainsbury to buy much needed food supplies – I have been making meals out of half a mouldy pepper, a pack of out-of-date cheese and some green sprouting potatoes for days (well, not quite but I’m claiming a bit of poetic licence here). Photograph roof of Sainsbury's – click. Before you ask - yes, this really is Sainsbury's roof. Rush back to Uni to sit in another darkened room alone but not alone. Try to learn something else. Get back in the car. Dash home. Arrive home 7.15pm. Put away shopping. Make dinner. Day end.

Number of conversations with non-hostile people – 1. (DM)
Number of conversations with hostile people – 1. (neighbour)
Number of other human “contacts” – 0.

I wonder if tomorrow will be more exciting? Let’s hope so, it could hardly be any less exciting.