The stars rule our world don’t they?

My star (Leo) says I am a clumsy oaf tonight……..and it’s right.

I’ve been taken out to celebrate my birthday (a bit prematurely) and I’ve disgraced myself ……again.

I don’t know what it is about me but I am so clumsy I can always create havoc wherever I go. Tonight is no exception. I’ve been given the most wonderful hospitality and I’ve blown it by breaking a Christmas pressie given to my host by her Dad.

Amazingly this isn’t something done after way too much wine or beer – in fact, as is often the case with my worst bouts of clumsiness, I have done it when I’ve only had 1 ½ beers.

We’ve been down the road for a ‘ruby’ and wandered home with me with no pic. I got into the house and thought ‘oh, they’d make a great piccy so I balanced the three ducks on top of a box to shoot them in silhouette but managed to knock them off their box and break a beak.

I’m bereft.

As a general rule, my clumsiness is, on the balance of probability something that only I (and DM) have to put up with so the glass I broke at home yesterday while unloading the dishwasher didn’t matter to anyone except me. Equally the countless other bits and bobs I break each week are usually mine.

Somehow though, I seem to also manage to break things that are precious to my friends and family. Many years ago, I broke an abacus that belonged to my sister’s teacher, when he’d lent it to her for a photography assignment (how ironic is that). I still get the shudders when I remember that one and I have a strong suspicion I will remember tonight’s breakage for as long and as painfully. I’ve also reversed into my ex’s car and broken it, knocked over ornaments, set fire to things and generally can be relied on to cause mayhem. Hell, I even managed to lose my boss’s nine year old daughter’s hamster once! (Long story for another day.)

I really am crap at these things (as well as the countless other things I’m also crap at). So, if your star says ‘avoid silly old mares whose name begins with L’ then do. I should be shut in a box and left there where I can do no damage to anything.

Last year my gorgeous and long-suffering man was my subject, sat at the wheel of his precious beetle - all I can say is 'keep it well away from me, I can't be trusted with precious stuff.'