We have loads of cards on our mantelpiece at the moment for four events:

1. My exam results
2. Our wedding anniversary
3. Thanks for helping a friend
4. DM leaving job

…only the first two are true celebrations – both of which are worthy of “congratulations”. The third is another shameful photography thing. We were sent an unbelievably tatty black and white print of wedding that had occurred 60 years ago. It was torn, creased and covered in mildew as well as being taken on a box brownie or similar and with scant regard for composition. For example the bride had a chimney stack climbing out of her head. But the photo had huge sentimental meaning for the couple because it was the only photo that existed of their big day as the official photographer got lost and didn’t get to the wedding. They had unearthed this photo from who-knows-where and we were asked if we could “make it better”. In all honesty it was beyond my capabilities but DM worked on it for a bit then forgot about it for months. He had another spurt of activity when we were prodded six months later and again another six months later. Eventually, after having the photo for about 18 months we produced a “final” thing. We felt hideously guilty about not delivering the goods months earlier yet after we sent it we got such a lovely “thank you” that we felt even more guilty! The last – well, I ask you – you push someone out of a job then say “sorry you’re leaving” – smacks of two-facedness to me.

To be honest, and not being ungrateful for the good wishes, I’d trade the lot for a single card saying “congratulations on your new job”. Yep – another “thanks but no thanks” today – this time, it was because I was deemed to be “unlikely to fit the team dynamic”. OK – so is that because I’m not nice enough, not young enough, not thin enough or not compliant enough? Give me a clue…