Is this a real species? Nope. Is this a real flower? Nope. Am I a real scientist? Nope. I am a fake scientist and I have named my fake flower in my own honour.
I am kidding myself if I think anything else. I think I know the stuff I am revising and then an hour later it has all gone away from my brain. It’s as if it evaporates out of my brain, slips through pores in my skull then drips down my hair and onto the floor.
Remind me again. What is a syngameon? How does incomplete lineage sorting work again? What was the name of the bloke that did the research about the number of extinctions when climate gets warmer? Did the bloke who thought up the recognition species concept do it in 1985 or 1995?
I think there is an “isolating barrier” around my brain. Not to stop it from reproducing but to stop it from recollecting! The only thing I can remember is that the Ecological Species Concept was done by Van Valen in 1976. Why do I remember this? I think of Eddie Van Halen doing a concept album in a break from his “day job” in 1976 called “Ecological Species”. Yeah, yeah, bloody pathetic I know.
So, it’s true. I am Fictus scientificus personified. I want to hide in a corner and cry.