The Dark side of IKEA vase addiction.
Okay, first you start with glasses. Plain table glasses and you say, "Hey, all my friends are doing glasses, they're harmless. No one ever got addicted to ordinary table glasses." And before you know it there's just no satisfaction in ordinary table glasses. Besides, everybody is doing "ordinary." You've never been one of the pack, never been a follower so you experiment with shot glasses and wine glasses and glasses of strange shape and size. But it's just not the same. You start looking for bigger kicks and you descover crystal. Oh, and if you're bold you go for the designer crystal, you go for the really primo s**t. Nothing ordinary will do. Before you know it you're shooting Waterford, you're shooting lots of it. You're shooting Waterford glasses and goblets and even champagne flutes. You fill the Waterford Crystal with expensive drinks, with fine vintage wines and old single malt scotch or delicate flowers and blossoms. That makes the highs. All the while you tell your spouse and family that you can give it up anytime you want. But still your life feels empty.
Then there's that fateful day you walk into IKEA. And there they are. Small, inexpensive, and colorful. Wow, color. Colors like you've never experienced. And translucent, they simply scream wonderful things to you. So you score a vase or two. And you find that vases with backlight are the most brilliant thing you've ever done. You can't get enough. Soon, the few vases you have just aren't enough. Late at night you go back to IKEA and score some more. Pretty soon you've got the whole set and you start thinking, "I need more of that blue vase, Man, what I could do with a set of five clear vases. Oh, Man! If I only had five clear vases." They're not feeder vases, IKEA is the end of the line. They are the ultimate. When you're riding high on IKEA vase addiction, life is good. You are filled with the joy and the colors and the praise and the fulfilment of the IKEA vases. What else could you possibly want.
And then one day you think, "I wonder where I can score some Ming Dynasty Vases?"
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